CLICK HERE FOR BLOGGER TEMPLATES AND MYSPACE LAYOUTS »

Thursday, September 18, 2008

A Crazy Last Few Weeks

The last few weeks have been very busy, scary but I pray getting better...

Late last night I finally got out of the hospital...two hospital visits in the last 3 weeks is enough to make anyone nuts!!!!

I wont go into great details but the latest visit was only 4 days but the scariest by far that Ive had in a long long time...well since the med overdose during my Jan (this year) visit...

Vomiting blood, chest pain and a few other complaints turned out to be my INR (blood clotting time) being double what it should have been and ending up with me having yet another stress test and me getting my first and I pray only blood transfusion....getting plasma to help thicken my blood...boy was that scary....when told that "that" is what they needed to do...I not only went over all of the chances of getting "bad" blood...(by the way the chances of getting HIV, and other things from blood is roughly 2 in 2 million which is greatly reashuring but still very scary...but I also couldnt get over the fact that the plasma "came" from someone else...it was a very strange odd feeling...not to mention that I needed meds to help with anxiety that "that" was giving me....I was feeling so ill with the thoughts going on in my head (and my phy things too) that I truly thought I was going to have to tell them to stop the treatment...I dont know if that is common with people who get transfusions but it was a horrible ordeal for me anyway. Even with a million prayers for the Lord to calm me.

But NOW i am home....still need the surgery (gallbladder) but cant till my blood issues are totally resolved...so I have to go back to UAMS (Little Rock Ark.) to see a doc with general surg and then get an appointment to have that done...

I know I have alot of health issues...and I pray for healing, I guess my faith is just too little...I try to work on that but its just very hard for me...Ive been dealing with my health issues for years, but more so in the last 4-5 years...and the last 2 years it seems ive had nothing but endless hospital stays.....I just feel so weak sometimes...I mean I know I am blessed and things could be so much worse...there are people out there that deal with so much more than me....but I am just so sick of being sick....sometimes I feel like God is just not listening or is ignoring my cries for him.....I feel worthless so much of the time...

Tuesday, August 26, 2008

Sharing Jesus

Today I didnt go to therapy...my feelings on it have changed somewhat...I now know that I have God to talk to about my problems, his advice and help is so much more personal...dont you think? So I will be contacting my PCP and letting her know that I dont need to go anymore. Yes my "issues" will always pop up from time to time but things have just changed....I dont know how to explain it any better...


My friend Chuck called today...hes always such a "up" person...I really enjoy talking to him....today we talked about life in general and then we started talking about the Lord...hes a Christian and has in the past prayed for me for certain things Ive needed prayer on and just prays for me everyday...WHICH I am touched by...we share alot of beliefs about God....I enjoyed sharing Jesus with him today...I wish I could talk to Robert about God without having him go "way off base" which he almost always does...I love him so much and pray that the Spirit touches him and softens some of his "hardness"....like I said in a post on a forum the other day...Im NOT going to Heaven as a single gal!!!


Yesterday I had a chance to talk to my mother about me rededicating my life to the Lord and we talked for quite awhile about it and things and what we believe etc....I pray for her and her husband that they break free from the "cult" that they/she believes so strongly in like I have and find the "REAL GOD" Who is the God that created this beautiful earth that we all live on and created all of us in a very special way....the God that I will see face to face when my life here is over....I dont know where it is in the Bible, im still very new at learning...but I know somewhere it reads "Satan can come as an Angel of Light" or something like that....and he feeds us HIS lies and when we are weak and looking for answers....THATS when look for something that makes us feel good....and false Gods can look VERY real to us...I pray that thier eyes open up to the truth!!!


Brand Spanking New



So, I just opened this account to share my daily life with everyone...

I will talk about my newly rededicated Faith in Jesus Christ, my family, my friends, my health and anything else I can think of...

I will close this short first blog by posting one of my favorite Bible verses...


"If ye have faith as a grain of mustard seed, ye shall say unto this mountain, Remove hence to younder place; and it shall remove; and nothing shall be impossible to you."Romans 1:17